Child Custody False Allegations - Dirty Tactics,
What’s an Honest Parent to do?

When an upstanding, honest, hardworking parent get’s blindsided by an angry ex it can really shake you to the core. After all, all you ever promised to do was be the best parent and partner you could be. When the partnership ended you had no idea that you were going to be forced to explore the boundaries of the bizarre and twisted too.

Once you’ve spent years with someone, shared joy, sorrow, triumphs, and failures together, you take for granted that even if you can’t stay together at least you can work together for the best interest of your child. Maybe you didn’t spend years married but still had a child together, the same level of trust gets assumed. And even if you only knew each other for a short time you never gave anyone reason to believe you were a horrible person.

No matter which scenario fits you, it all comes down to having your child’s other parent falsely accuse you of something that couldn’t be farther from the truth. Why would they do that? Because they are embittered, things aren’t going well for them or even worse, things may be going good for you. If you give it some thought, I’m sure you will be able to uncover their motivation.

But why did they falsely accuse you not only of something you didn’t do, but something that they know you would never do? Simple, because it upsets you and throws you off of your “doing well” streak. You see the best defense is a good offense. If you are busy defending yourself, there is no way for you to continue to show what a great parent you are.

So what’s an honest parent to do? Simple, go back on offense. Your offense changes from taking about what a great parent you are, to confronting the charge. You see, courts, mediators, evaluators, and Child Protective Services have all been around the block before you and your ex came along. You just remind them of it.

The first thing you do is simply deny the charge. Nothing fancy, just a matter of fact “no, not me”. Then you follow on with, “you know we are in a high conflict custody battle? Apparently, things aren’t going their way”. Then question why this never came up before. Talk about all the minor things that the other parent told you before. How could they worry about all those minor details if this was true? Realize that you are now in a serious battle and document everything. Time is your ally.

If you are high conflict there will be a reluctance from the courts to allow joint custody. Because of this you will need to learn about parallel parenting. This is different from co-parenting. Learn about it and embrace it.

Now, armed with the knowledge that you were doing well, the fact that you can document this was never an issue, and the knowledge of parallel parenting, you can that false allegation and turn it to your advantage. That is the power an honest parent has against dirty tactics.